Maria
& Louis' Birth
Story Auckland, New Zealand
  I
had a dream pregnancy, no morning sickness, perfect
blood pressure & sugar levels, no back pain
(apart from a little discomfort sleeping towards
the end), no constipation, stretch marks &
just a touch of heartburn now & then. So it’s
easy to understand how I enjoyed my pregnancy
so much. I loved the experience, I was constantly
amazed & in awe of my body & what it was
capable of.
I decided I wanted the birth
to be as natural as possible, with as little intervention
as possible. A friend of mine had had homebirths
with both of her boys & they had been wonderful
experiences. I liked the whole idea of a homebirth,
being in the privacy & comfort of your own
surroundings, familiar people around you, taking
all the time you need, trusting yourself &
your body – no hospital room, no monitors,
no strangers, no pressure to hurry things along
and no doctors wanting to intervene with drugs
& medical procedures. Of course a lot of people
were very shocked & disapproving of me giving
birth at home. They were shocked because they
couldn’t believe I’d give birth without
any drugs, and disapproving that we would risk
not being in a hospital in case something went
wrong. I find it so sad & frustrating that
women in our society have been conditioned to
believe that they are no longer capable or strong
enough to give birth outside of hospitals!!
In the first 2 trimesters I read
everything I could to prepare myself for what
to expect, how it would feel, how painful it would
be, what could go wrong etc…. Then in the
last trimester I made a decision that for the
last 3 months I would focus only on the positive,
I refused to talk to anyone about any negative
birth experiences, I stopped thinking about the
pain or about what could go wrong. I would only
talk to people who had positive things to say
& I would visualize the birth that I wanted
in my head over & over again. We prepared
the area in the house we planned to use for the
labour; we bought the birthing pool, blew it up
& had it all ready to go. I never felt at
all scared or apprehensive about the actual birth.
I was excited & couldn’t wait to go
into labour.
Due to me being in my late 30’s
my midwife referred me to an obstetrician at the
hospital when I was around 35 weeks just to get
the OK that everything looked good for a homebirth.
He was more than happy but suggested we monitor
the baby from 37 weeks onwards just to be safe
& also requested that I get a scan to check
the amount of fluid in my uterus. So, off I went
for my scan……and low & behold,
the cheeky little monkey in my belly was breech!!
Not just breech but footling breech, with one
leg extended & the other bent. There was no
chance of a vaginal birth…….and just
like that my plans for a homebirth were over.
I was booked in for a caesarean
& as I sat and listened to the doctor explain
the procedure I could feel myself getting upset.
This was exactly what I didn’t want the
birth to be – a medical procedure, in a
hospital, surrounded by unfamiliar faces, drugs
pumped into me through tubes attached to my body.
I felt a huge amount of disappointment, I felt
angry that the control was being taken out of
my hands & I felt cheated of a birthing experience.
Over the next couple of days
I shed a few tears, & then I thought, “OK
so this isn’t the birth I planned for but
that doesn’t mean it can’t be a positive
experience”. I began focusing on all the
positive things about having a caesarean –
I reminded myself that I was so lucky that this
procedure was available to me, because years ago
women & babies died in childbirth due to footling
breech births. I was thankful that we found out
before going into labour so I didn’t have
the stress of an emergency c-section. And, as
my husband Greig pointed out, it meant I got to
keep my “designer vagina” in tact.
On the morning of 28th December
Greig & I headed to the hospital. I wasn’t
nervous or scared, I felt calm but excited. At
9am we walked down to the theater. There was a
bit of a wait for the doctor but finally he arrived
& at 10.51am our little boy was lifted from
my belly crying his wee heart out. He stopped
crying almost the instant he was placed on my
chest & I finally got to see the little face
that I had been dreaming about for 39 weeks. At
that moment, all that mattered was that he was
in my arms & that he was healthy, how he had
come into the world was completely irrelevant.
At the end of the day it’s
important to remind yourself……You
don’t get pregnant to have a birth, you
get pregnant to have a baby!!
Maria 39, Mum of Louis, born
in Auckland, New Zealand on 28 December 2008
You
might be interested in the Joyful Childbirth 3
hour Antenatal Class for Natural Pain Relief |
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